It's H&A meets consumer reports! These are stories of our experiences with various companies who have all gone out of their way by us... some to make real boneheads of themselves, some to extend us a helping hand.

In case you don't want to scroll through all of these, just pick the company you'd like to check out:

Bank One, BB&T, T Mobile, American General Finance, Adelphia Cable

High Power Tech, CitiBank, Adelphia Cable, Cingular, Glenn Nissan

To keep things positive, we'll start with the good guys.

As far as banks go, it's pretty safe to say we're tickled pink with these folks. Alex had a run-in three years ago with another bank that caused him to end up on a list that basically blacklists you from being able to get a checking account anywhere. Heather had been with Bank One for three years, and her good standing prompted a very kind branch manager named Kim to give him a chance as well. We shall sing their praises forevermore.

Why does it seem that all the good people on this list are only on there because Alex made a bonehead mistake that they made good on? Sheesh. :)

BB&T gets a big gray smiley for just that reason. Alex was (foolishly) in charge of the checkbook for a season, and was making Heather's car payment to BB&T. A check was written and stuck in an envelope, at which time Alex experienced one of those times when you really should not second guess yourself. Thinking that the envelope was lost, Alex called BB&T and made a payment over the phone. Lo and behold, the check arrived at BB&T the same day. They cashed the check, causing a substantial amount to come out of the account when, to be honest, it was not very convenient. Realizing she was married to a lunatic and realizing the error, Heather called and explained what had happened. The nice folks at BB&T mailed a check back, overnight.

We had to put this company on the list, mainly by virtue of the fact that they're the only cell phone company that hasn't caused our blood pressure to go up. We were only with them for a year, and in that time, experienced no deception, no surprises, and fairly good service. We left them after a year mainly because they didn't have the coverage we wanted... and we have regretted it several times since. For more details about THAT mess, scroll down to the piece on Cingular.

As finance companies go, Alex would certainly prefer not to use them at all. Given, interest rates are not as good as banks, and most of the time they try to roll you into a new loan so you just keep paying forever. Not actually the case with these folks. Not to Alex's experience, at least.

It's possible the impression could be a bit tainted. We used these people to help get Alex out of the clutches of that evil bastion of the banking world, CitiBank. Specifically, a CitiBank credit card. The result ended up to be pretty good... he cut his interest rate in half, and more importantly (perhaps MOST importantly) we stopped giving CitiBank money. We've actually had two loans from these folks, and the customer service and their willingness to work with us has been unbelievably good.

And speaking of CitiBank, on to the bad/ ugly portion.

We're writing this complaint as we're in the middle of the mess with these jokers. Basically, they're contractors with Dish Network, and they installed a dish on top of our house. A week after the install, water came in on our breaker box. We had some professionals look at not only the breaker box, but also the roof, and -- lo and behold -- the roof was leaking around the dish install. Apparently, some of the shingles had been damaged, and water had started coming in.

We filed a claim with Dish Network, who sent it down to their contractor, High Power Tech. We danced around the mulberry bush with them for almost three weeks before they finally decided that, despite the statements of professional roofers and the builders of our house, they were not responsible for the damage. Heather filed a complaint with the BBB and we decided to as a friend of ours to help us fix it. More news to come... but in the meantime, folks... if you're getting Dish network installed on your house for the first time, make sure that if you live around the Lexington or Louisville area, you request that High Power Tech NOT do your installation.

It's really possible that we could write a book on all the ways we have grown to loathe this company and really believe they are evil.

It all started with, you guessed it, a mistake that Alex made. The times were hard, money was tight, and big A made a payment late to his credit card company which had recently been purchased by CitiBank. How they responded is almost unthinkable. On the next statement, Alex could see that they had charged him nearly $200 for this indiscretion... for what you might ask? We're glad you do. First, the late fee. Then, they decided that would be a good time to lower his credit limit... so they did. Only problem was, as close to his limit as he was, this caused his previously held balance to be OVER his new limit. So then he got an over limit fee as well. And of course, they were also too happy to charge a service fee as well. Sheesh. Moral of the story: stay the heck away from credit cards if you can't pay your balance. Heck, stay away from Citi even if you can. They'll find a way to shaft you one way or the other.

I had some other stories to tell about Citi as well, but none of them were quite to the limit of that one, and have been subsequently forgotten. Possibly, they have been replaced by happy thoughts. :) Suffice it to say, the barrage of credit card offers we get from them on an almost daily basis ALWAYS get "Return to Sender" written on them. Good news, though... we paid off the card! No more giving them money!

The process of losing all hope with Adelphia cable happened in two parts, really... the first part being a total lack of competence in the area of installing cable television, and the other being a set of communications with their internet people which could only lead us to the conclusion that this particular area of the company must surely be run by trained chimps.

The TV situation happened first. We called and set up a time for them to come hook us up, Heather got there about half an hour before the time. They never showed. Heather called THEM (yes, I know... that's the first bad sign) to find out what happened, and as it turns out, the tech decided that he would just try us about an hour before they scheduled the hookup, we weren't there, and he left. So we scheduled another time.

This time around, the tech saved himself the trip altogether. He never showed. Heather again called the geniuses at customer services and, lo and behold, he just hadn't made it out that day. We decided that they weren't really into picking up new customers, so we went with Dish Network instead. Wouldn't you know it? They came when they were supposed to and hooked us up with a smile.

Part 2: The monkeys at Adelphia high-speed internet service

I suppose this story could, in a way, not be all Adelphia's fault. The correspondences we had this time around actually happened with some third-party company (I think they must have been based out of some foreign jungle, based on how bad their English was in emails and the lack of understanding they had.)

In spite of the low opinion we had of Adelphia's customer service, we saw a special they were running online and decided to spring for their high-speed internet. Alex tried to sign up online, but the site wouldn't cooperate... the regular price would show each time he went to finish the process. So, an email was sent to the folks running the special, indicating that he was having troubles with their site. They responded by saying (we are not kidding about this) that they were 'not in charge of home installations.' Alex returned their email, stating clearly (in large, capital letters) that the problem had nothing to do with the home installation, the problem was with their site and the price he was supposed to be paying. Another response came, once again (you guessed it) a statement that they were not responsible for home installations.

That was pretty much all we needed to hear from them. Another email was sent explaining the problem again, telling them this was the last one we'd send, and a notice that they had just lost business. Don't know if that translated into the chimp language or not, they never replied.

We became infuriated with BellSouth DSL when, to make a long story short, they disconnected our DSL and didn't seem to know how to get it back on. So, we decided to give Adelphia another chance.

At first it was more of the same... the first day that they had use scheduled for hookup, Alex took off work in the morning. They were supposed to be there by 1:00. At 12:30, Alex got a call that they weren't going to make it. He was ticked royally, went ahead and scheduled a replacement setup time, and went to work.

Now for the positive part. First of all, the guy who hooked everything up was super nice and really helpful. To top that off, they were running some wicked special when we called which enabled us to get some stuff for free... something we always like. They ended up getting us a $20 credit for the (latest) day they missed our hookup, and to really show how sorry they were for all the heartache, they knocked another $20 a month off our bill. The customer service has been very positive since we joined the family as well... so we're happy campers again. Always good to see a company go the extra mile to correct their blunders for the customer.

The whole issue we've had with Cingular has been billing. It's one of those situations that really makes you wonder if you are yourself, in fact, losing your mind.

At some point after we'd been with Cingular nearly a year, they decided to stop sending us bills. We didn't notice until they sent one of those friendly voice mails to us that said they were about to cut our service off, pay now, we'll kill your family. We were a little confused, so Heather called.

The rep she talked to didn't know why we hadn't gotten a bill, but said she'd send us a detailed billing so we could see what we were being charged for. Three weeks later, THAT bill hadn't arrived. (In the meantime, we had paid our bill over the phone to avoid losing service). Alex called and checked on the reason why the bill hadn't been sent, and the rep that he talked to said that the rep Heather had talked to surely had mailed out our bill, it was probably just taking the postal service a while to deliver. That goofy postal service.

About two days after that, we got TWO copies of the afore mentioned bill. Apparently the hairball in the postal service had been coughed up, and by some miracle, they were delivering Cingular's mail again. How nice of them.

We hate being lied to.

UPDATE: At about the one-and-a-half-year mark of our two-year contract, we went to explore new packages that Cingular was offering. Alex had asked, on the day we signed up, whether or not we'd be given the benefit of some new, better package somewhere down the line, if we decided to change. The guy we bought our phones from said "Yes, anytime." Alex says, "Without having to add more years to our contract?" "Yes," says Mr. Salesman. Guess what? You can't do that! The Cingular guy we talked to the next time around looked at us like we were morons when we asked. Guess what we found out, though? Here's a great tip for you... while signing up directly with a wireless company (i.e., walking into the Cingular store) usually warrants a 2-year contract, you can go through a third party (i.e., one that's not named the same as the wireless company), and you usually only have to sign a one-year contract. This is beneficial to you not only because you're locked in for less time, but also because most cell phone warranties are only good for a year... which means, if you get a new phone with your contract, you don't have to worry about shelling out $150 for a new phone if something happens to yours. Heather and I have decided, therefore, to still use Cingular's matchless coverage area, but take our contract through a little third-party company called Wireless Warehouse. They have offices in Georgetown, Nicholasville and Lexington, that we know of.

These folks are likely to have their own page very soon, and a newly-created smiley that's bug-eyed, screaming, with its little head on fire.

It's very unfortunate that a car we are loving so much had to come as the result of the rockiest car-buying transaction in modern history.

Alex's lifetime dream of driving an SUV finally came true, we decided to trade his ailing Honda in for a Nissan Pathfinder. The sales guy we got was a really nice fellow... we really felt that we got a good deal, and we liked the guy. We closed it up and headed home.

Problem #1: Yes, this one was partly Alex's fault. Heather's bonehead hubby told the folks at Glenn the wrong payoff total for his Honda, so the loan got screwed up. Not a big deal, says our finance guy, I'll just run it through again. And so he did. A month later (a week after we had made our first payment), we got a call from the loan company wondering where the money was. To make a long story short, we had two loans. Our finance guy hadn't cleared one of them out. A week or so later, we got that cleared up.

Problem #2: Don't expect correct answers to ALL of your questions. When we bought the rig, we asked a specific question: "Will we have to pay taxes and registration again in 3 months?" (Three months from when we bought was Alex's birthday, when he usually paid vehicle tax.) Our finance guy (yes, him again) told us "no." You can only imagine our surprise when, 3 months later, we got the bill for those taxes. Long story short again, we called Glenn, and the guy basically admitted he didn't know what he was talking about to start with. They agreed (and on this point, we must really award them one point) and said they would send us out a check the next week. Wait! It can't be that easy.

Three weeks later, the check was still AWOL. Heather called, and wouldn't you know it? The lady who was supposed to send the check out actually told Heather "it was lost under some papers on my desk, I mailed it yesterday." At least we weren't lied to this time, the check arrived that same day. Three weeks late.

UPDATE: Holy Moses. I wonder if I'll ever have good news from these people.

After the original posting, yet another problem presented itself. Our financial guy (YES, him AGAIN) apparently never completed the process for an extended warranty that we purchased. When I discovered this problem and called him, he said he was 'very glad I had discovered this problem, otherwise it might have been overlooked.' In other words, if I hadn't found out that they never got our warranty in effect, we would have just paid for nothing. To top it off, the dude said that we weren't eligible for the warranty that he tried to get in the first place, but that we could get another warranty that was much better. Which presses the question, "WHY ON EARTH DIDN'T YOU GET US THAT ONE TO START WITH?!?!?!?!

Tearing my hair out seems, at this point, a pretty good idea.

I hate to be all negative, so I should say that we have had pretty good experience with Glenn's service department. Also, our sales guy was fantastic... he even called six months after the sale to see how we were doing. (What an earful I had to give him that day...) Were it not for the major headache we've gotten from financial, we'd probably even be heartily recommending the place to people. Because of those problems, we are most certainly NOT recommending them. Unless, of course, you're able to go and pay cash for your shiny new Nissan and avoid the financial guys completely.

UPDATE... AGAIN....

Now a year a half after the purchase, we thought we had finally had our fill of these folks. NOPE! Alex went to pay registration on his Nissan for 2005, and guess what the nice lady at the county clerk told him? He owed the previous year's registration on his Honda! Now, the Honda had been traded and signed over to Glenn in December of 2003, it was legally their property before the first of 2004. You pay tax and registation on what you own at the start of the year. So why, you wonder, did I have this showing up as being MY responsibility? You guessed it! The geniuses at Glenn had waited 3 (yes, THREE) months to transfer the vehicle to their name. And in the course of those three months, of course, a new year started, meaning that it was still showing up as mine. Gee, I wish I would have known! I could have sold it again!

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